Both immigrant and multiple generation parents want their kids to succeed. They teach them a set of values, the secret sauce to success or just hustling it out, moral imperatives and more. For example, it can be about the value of hard work, the value of networking, the value of hustling and recognizing opportunities where others see none, and many more things. Where the two categories of parents diverge is in what they do next. Multiple generation parents who have their roots in America deep and over a long period of time know this environment so much better. They know that North America is the place of innovation, fast progress, disruptive changes and leadership in societal, scientific, tech and business evolution. As such, they know that once they impart their values to their kids, they take a mostly hands off approach. This allows their kids to take the values and world view they got from their parents, and then they take it in a modern, up to date direction. They understand that their kids know much better than they do what works best right this minute. They offer their kids some basic guidance, but at the same time they understand they should keep it limited as they are set in their ways and not up to date. This, dearest readers, creates success like you would not believe unless you have lived it and enjoyed it.
Immigrant parents, however, do not follow this pattern. After imparting their values and world view on their kids, they want them to pick a life path they dictate! Immigrant parents leave behind their homeland, everything they know, and take a huge risk to give their kids the best chance at a great life. This makes them angry, strict, way too worried and controlling. They want their kids to pick whatever life path they choose from them, and they want their kids to play it safe. Be a doctor or lawyer or MBA or something and don't deviate. This, dearest readers, totally sucks. It causes immigrant kids to either rebel against their parents because they know they are meant for something else, or they acquiesce and end up being very unhappy professionals who cry in their Porsche after a round of whiskey and pot, if not cocaine. That is not success, nor is it happiness. Immigrant parents fail to understand that the values and views they impart to their kids can be taken in newer modern directions and make new, modern things happen that will bring them wealth, success and happiness. E sports professional, social media influencer, YouTube content creator with monetization and sponsors, apparel brand creator... There are so many things immigrant kids can become that their parents cannot even conceptualize, but still driven by those parents' values- they just have to let their kids do it the way most heritage North American families do!
When you do things this way, you are pushing your kids to take your core values in a new direction and continue the evolution of North American society in new, interesting directions and more often than not to new, amazing heights. This beautiful synergy is at the core of the North American dream, and all of us should partake. When we do, amazing things happen.